I annually find the holidays to be a time for reflection, to count my blessings, and wish that I could help more and give more. A recent incident with Ryan gave me my ONE WORD to work on this year…..patience.
This year, the holidays seemed stressful most of the time. I felt tugged in many directions and was not making anyone happy, including myself. I felt closed in with my emotions, physical space, and inability to get out much. My boys and nephew had numerous sleeping challenges, which made everyone else fatigued and worn out. On the flip side (much more important), I enjoy seeing our families tremendously and am thankful to have the opportunity to see so many.
When at my parent’s house one evening, I was going to give Ryan his bath. We were both tired, I was grumpy and Ryan was not focused. When I picked him up to take him to the bathtub, he was distracted by something and turned away to try and grab something. When he swung his arms back, he hit me square in the face, knocking off my glasses and giving me a cut on the nose. In an attempt to contain these efforts, I took his face in my right hand and said in frustration “Ryan, BE CAREFUL! YOU JUST HIT ME IN THE FACE AND KNOCKED MY GLASSES OFF!” I was MAD!
With a calmness and gentleness that instantly touched my soul, Ryan looked me squarely in the eye (not expected from a three-year old), and magically said, “It will be ok Daddy, I’m sorry”. It wasn’t just what he said, but the look of strength and empathy in his eyes directly looking into my eyes and soul. My anger instantly melted and I was so grateful that he brought me back to what is important, being a loving and gentle father.
Coincidentally, I had seen on twitter the trending of #ONEWORD. I looked into the book. The thought is that most New Year’s Resolutions fail, but picking one word for the year and building your improvement around this word works more effectively. The book provides some structure and case studies of how others have used One Word to improve their lives.
I had been struggling to think of my word, but Ryan made me realize this is an area of improvement. I don’t want a legacy that I leave my wife and children is that I get frustrated too easily. I have found I quickly give myself feedback and say my One Word to reinforce its meaning. It is an easy concept and can be shared with your inner circle so they can help support you in living your word.
I wish you blessings in the New Year and would love to hear from you how your resolutions are going.