#Lunchboxnotes 10.17.16

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My speech to our student management staff on personal development

 

Ron’s Leadership/Personal Development Resources/Notes

 

If you believe it, you can achieve it.

 

In customer service, it is important to realize patrons don’t know/understand our terminology.  We must interpret, ask questions, create links, and ask for affirmation.

 

You will be the same person five years from now that you are today, except for the people in your life and what you learn.

 

Expectations of children, why not adults?

 

  • If reading is important for children, it is important for you!
  • You are the average of the Five People you associate with the most.  Are you getting value in these relationships?

 

Utilize the University On Wheels, Exercising Your Body and Mind.

 

What’s on your Twitter feed?  Best way to filter your information

 

John Wooden Pyramid of Success

 

Next play…but reflect later for improvement

 

Starting is half-finished

 

Fail forward

 

Parkinson’s law

 

Don’t worry about what to do in the next 3 days, get to work for the next 15 minutes

 

30 day habits

 

Andy Andrews Seven Decisions

 

  • The Buck Stops Here
  • I will seek wisdom
  • I am a person of action
  • I have a decided heart
  • Today, I will choose to be happy
  • I will greet this day with a forgiving spirit
  • I will persist without exception

 

Find someone who is doing what you want to do, and develop a relationship with them.  Search for podcasts, YouTube subscriptions

 

Don’t want to purchase books, use your free library card.

 

One resource will lead you to another, which leads you to another in an endless web of resources, learning, and skill acquisition.

 

Here are some resources I believe will aid tremendously in your personal development::

 

Trust Your Process….Second Thoughts often lead to playing catch up

Over the last two weeks, I refined and defined my morning routine.  I want to be up at 4a to complete at least two of my projects before going to work or being daddy.  I try to map out my day the night before so my subconscious is aware.  Often, I am up before my alarm goes off.

This morning presented an opportunity that I did not take advantage of.  Ryan woke me up yelling “daddy, daddy, help me, help me!”  Because (a):  it sounded like an emergency (b):  I did not want him to wake up Sawyer (c):  he was calling for me, not mommy; I jumped from my bed quick as a flash to see what ’twas the matter.

After feeling my way through the darkness, I found a light and turned it on before going up the stairs (no toy monsters grabbed my feet today) to Ryan’s room.  The “emergency” was that Jeffrey the giraffe fell out his bed.  He could have bent over out of bed to pick it up, that’s how close it was.  Nevertheless, I am always happy to see him so I did what he asked and told him to go back to sleep.  What amazes me is how he knows when one of his pets has fallen out of bed….it’s dark and he has around 15 stuffed animals or toys in bed in with him.

After returning to bed, the clock said 3:39a.  Ryan had gotten me up just before my alarm, what a wonderful opportunity!  Instead, I rationalized that I needed more sleep and reset the alarm to 5a, which then became 5:26a after snoozing the alarm multiple times.  The Ryan wake up had me feeling fresh and raring to go….laying down and sleeping extra made me groggy.  Also, I forgot that I have a meditation/reflection time around 6a in which I get a nice refreshing power nap.

After getting going, I was not able to accomplish much this morning, and felt like I started the day behind.  The lesson I learned is…..trust the process I have laid out.  I gave it a great deal of thought and I am extremely focused and productive when I do so.  If a process is not working, you learn from it later and make changes as needed.  Trust YOUR process.

I would love to hear about any processes you use to get the most out of your day.  Take care and thank you for reading.

 

 

 

Reading about self-improvement is good, sticking to the plan is much better…

In a self-discovery this summer, I realized that I do a great job about reading self-improvement books, but a lousy job of executing the action plans.  I take bits and pieces for implementation (here are some of the books I am referring to).

This is a pattern I want to change.  Because it is not just about self-improvement action, it is also about diets, exercise, and the other plans that I have not followed through to completion on.

Starting in July, I made the commitment to the year-long process of reading and implementing the “Scrolls” laid out in the best-selling books by Og Mandino (The Greatest Salesman In The World and The Greatest Secret In The World)

The process that Mr. Mandino presented was the following for 30 days:

1.  read the same scroll for 30 days, 3 times a day

2.  in the last reading, read it aloud

3.  record how many times you read the scroll each day + grade yourself on applying a given principle

4.  record any appointments and achievements for the week

I am happy to report I have completed the first 30 days.  I plugged in appointments for my three daily readings, which helped keep me on track.

This first scroll was “I will greet this day with love in my heart.”  The given principle to apply was to silently say “I love you” for each person I interacted with.

My discovery was….when I made this silent statement, it helped relax me for the interaction.  If I forgot to do it, hopefully I had some carryover effect from recently doing it.  If I did not have the carryover, I definitely felt the difference in my presentation.

I would to say I completed 90 readings….but I did not.  But 78 is not too shabby.  I will continue to work to improve this %.

I have now embarked on the second Scroll “I will persist until I succeed”.  The given principle this month is to not leave work without having a success to leave on.

Now that I have made this commitment public, I hope those of you reading this will check in with me and help hold me accountable.  I would appreciate this greatly.

Is there anything you would like me to hold you accountable for?  Any success stories in completing self-improvement plans?  What difference did it make in your life?

Look forward to hearing from you.

Ron

Life Lessons for my sons: #1 Constructive criticism

“Don’t listen to the fact he is calling you an a##hole, listen to the reason why he is calling you an a##hole.”  Dan Dakich giving advice to Steve Alford on the coaching techniques of Bob Knight.

Boys, as you go through life, something you need to understand is that you will receive criticism.  It does not matter whether you are trying to do something or not, you are not doing anything (and thereby getting someone upset), or you need to be corrected.  Sometimes you will deserve it, and sometimes you won’t.

It is human nature to become defensive and rationalize your behavior.  It is hard to stand there and take it, and sometimes embarassing as well.

To help you deal with the feedback, I think it important that you do the following:

  • Know your strengths and weaknesses.  It’s ok, everyone has them.   
  • Know what your core values are.  What is right, what is wrong?  Tip….if it involves shaming someone or makes you uncomfortable….it’s wrong
  • Who is offering the critique?  If the person is someone you love, respect, trust, thank them for the feedback.  They are trying to make you better.  If they are a scumbag or sniping from the outside, ignore it.

Mommy gives me this feedback on a daily basis.  I may not always react in the best manner, but I am trying to get better.

I was fortunate in a recent staff meeting to get some feedback on areas I was falling short.  The person giving the feedback pointed out issues with my communication style.  Their perceptions were the opposite of my intention, but in order to serve, you need to meet people where they are.  I value this relationship, so I will work at this.

You make your decision on your action, and then FAIL FORWARD!  You can’t erase the past, but you can learn from it and keep going.

Don’t act like a victim!  Don’t fall prey to this weak-minded thinking.

Best point to remember, your parents are always right (even when they are wrong)!

Readers, other lessons for my boys on this topic?

Introductions please

My name is Ron Siliko.  This is my lovely family (Jen, Ryan (standing), and Sawyer).  I have these three reasons why I am the luckiest man in the world.  

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I don’t know which way this blog will go day-to-day, but I am hoping it will help me remember my daily joys, fears, fails, what I learned, and maybe help out someone else.  I want this blog to also help me meet my self-improvement challenges and motivate me to aspire to my dreams.    

Looking forward to the ongoing journey!